Welcome!

I believe there are no accidents and that you have been guided here for a reason. If you listen closely, can you hear something from within you calling for change?

 

As I have looked out into the world, I have seen and experienced the disruption, chaos, pain, and separation that exists in the hearts and lives of many.

 

I recognize one core reason for this collective mass suffering as, our individual separation from ourselves, our hearts, and the universe within and around us. 

 

In many ways, this separation stems from growing up in a world that imposed rigid expectations upon us, dictating how we should appear, behave, and conform in order to be accepted, loved, or understood. Throughout the years, we are molded by the beliefs and worldviews of others, shaping our identities and influencing the way we navigate our lives.

 

From an early age, we learn to judge and devalue ourselves and others. This conditioning creates a divide that prevents us from feeling deep connection, trusting our intuition, making confident decisions, and genuinely knowing our true selves. Consequently, we seek validation, acceptance, and love from external sources, often to be left feeling empty, disconnected, and unfulfilled, returning to a sense of loneliness and dissatisfaction.

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Even though we desire to experience love, harmony, fulfillment, and peace in our lives, our conditioning, trauma, fear, and past experiences cause us to build limiting beliefs and ultimately barriers against love and ourselves. Thus, we numb ourselves to find relief from the pain. Turning our backs on possibility, our vision of an extraordinary future, and the version of ourselves we want to be, and somewhere within us know we truly are.

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The nuances that come together to form our concepts of life, ourselves, and others are intricate, delicate, and dependent on our own life experiences. All the messages we get from our external environments greatly influence our internal environment, the thoughts we think, and how we treat our bodies and minds, and thus the bodies and minds of others.

 

For many, the path toward healing and liberation, if taken at all, is often found when we are much older; the traumas have been buried, and the damage done. It comes after years of suffering and coping with painful memories, fear-based patterns, and desperately trying to anesthetize our pain with things such as food, sex, relationships, drugs, alcohol, etc.

 

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR?

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You see for a long time, I was battling the desire to be fully authentic and free in a world where in the eyes of others, I felt I could never quite meet the mark. I received messages from my external environments that I was too much OR not enough and I embodied those beliefs as though they were my own truths.  

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After years of living with extreme anxiety and running from childhood trauma, my past, and ultimately myself, I completely lost myself and my voice. I became severely depressed, miserable, bitter, and angry at the world for not seeing me, not hearing me, and not accepting me. A part of me had always known there was more than meet the eye with life and I could not believe that in the vastness of space of the Universe, that this life I had built for myself covered it all its limiting beliefs was all that was meant for me.

 

Then when I couldn't take my suffering anymore and was on the brink of leaving this physical body behind, I was gifted with a deep dark night of the soul. Though believe me this dark night lasted for much longer than one evening. I spent months trudging through the darkness of my own mind, only to find myself for what felt like the very first time (at least in this lifetime).