The most wild thing happened to me last night. I have been going kinda hard this last week week and anytime we are exhausted is sign that we have over depleted our cells. So I knew I was going to call it an early night.
Before I get into what happened last night, I gotta tell you I have been working on healing my back for some time. I spent a lot of time with various types of doctors and healers before deciding that I was going to take my healing into my own hands. I had heard of people that had done this on their own and after watching the documentary Heal I have been dedicated to fully heal myself, by myself. I don't want to get into any more of the specifics of it right now because I am smack dab in the middle of the healing process and I am not undoing any of my hard work by focusing on it any more than that. But its important for you to know that has been a huge focus in my meditations lately.
So back to it, yesterday I started listening to testimonials on Dr. Joe's YouTube page from individuals who have healed them selves of all sorts of ailments. During one of them, I was physically brought to my knees with gratitude. I knew that if these people could do it, so could I. I felt a part of myself surrender onto the floor because I knew that I could experience (in full) what these individuals had experienced. In this moment I know I unlocked something. In full disclosure I had also been listening to various guided meditations while working yesterday. Lets just say they took the place of background music.
So anyway the day goes on. I had already been planning meditating before bed, but was doing some "light" reading beforehand. I have always loved physics, but last night I was really digging into the ideas that flow from quantum models of thought. This is mostly because I started reading Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Dr. Joe Dispenza and wanted to think a little deeper on some of the physics stuff and (and this is the big one) because lately I have finally been able to feel with full awareness the vibrational reality that we are all a part of. I am scientist but also a spiritual individual in love with the mystical magical side of reality. So, naturally I use evidence as a guide in my life and I have never had evidence of my healing so profound as this. I should note that this being evidence to me can only resonate with you if you know in your heart what I speak of is truly possible.
I ended up having to stop reading about "theory" and immediately get to bed because while I was sitting there reading, I literally felt energy move from my solar plexus through to top of my head. It was as if my body was saying "lets go its time to heal, right now you gotta get vertical" So I took myself to bed like my spirit was telling me to.
I got into bed and went to work to finish my daily lesson for A Course in Miracles (Day 56) before beginning my meditation. I had to force myself to be dedicated in being present while reading the lesson because the moment I slipped into full awareness I had a hard time opening my eyes to read the words. Now, let me clarify, this was not because I was exhausted, rather it was because the words felt so bright on the page as if god was the words or was reading them to me. But I did it and the whole time felt immense energy pulsating through my body. After this, I did of Dr. Joe's guided meditations. Let me tell you, I have not had a lot of very visual mediation experiences, but last night It was if I could see everything in my mind clearly.
Immediately upon closing my eyes and focusing I saw an octopus; everything after that happened so fast. In the very beginning of the meditation as I was breathing and working to move energy through my body, I felt as though the hand of the divine was pressing down on my chest. I felt it being pressed down as it it were going to become pancake flat. I could see something like a cheese grater on my back that this stuff was just being squeezed out of. This white stuff just kept oozing out of my back. This happened for a while, until for a moment I became fearful and resisted, almost immediately I felt the most comforting presence pick me up and hold me like a small baby in its arms and rock me back and forth. I felt soothed and at ease and knew I just had to relax. Once I relaxed more, I could see, in my minds eye, this divine being flip me over and begin shaking me as if to get more of the stuff out of my back. Bits and pieces of white blocks just kept pouring out of my back. In another moment I was on my backside and being rolled over and stuck with a straw on my right side to drain more out. As energy was being released, I could feel my body shake and occasionally move in a somewhat sporadic fashion. Things like this happened throughout the meditation, and the whole time I could feel my spine was moving. I could feel the muscles in my back pulsating and moving. I know with all my being that divine energy was in the room with me helping me to heal. This went on for sometime until it was time for sleep.
This morning when I woke up I did another hour and a half meditation and I knew immediately that so much junk had been released from my body. I got out of bed and at first it felt like I had participated in an a 24 hr bike race, but the feeling went away as soon as I began moving. I can feel the difference in my body today, I can feel the difference in my back. I know I still have work to do, but because of my acceptance and surrender, I know I am healing. I have so much love and gratitude today for everyone and everything around me. I know that good things are on their way to me and I am dedicated to continue to do this work day in and day out. Even when my body and back are fully healed I'm going to keep working. I'm telling you, I can't go back to who I once was. This is something I have been saying for weeks since getting deep into the teachings of Abraham Hicks. But after last night, there is no going back. I have no doubt in my mind (not that I had much before) that we are all intricately connected to the divine. I know I am on my way. I know things are moving.
It is evident that this site will be a place where I will share my stories and experiences with my spiritual growth. I'm thinking of it kinda like an "open journal" of sorts. This is not only for me to have a space to get closer to myself but a space to share my stories with anyone who may just need to read them. This blog and this story is for anyone who has been struggling for a while, and/or working on healing. For those of you who may have been loosing faith, don't give up, don't give in, and don't let your ego win. You are source energy, and if you believe in it, you will heal too.